by John Forkner
Oh wow. In anticipation of the release of Star Fox 64 3D, I plugged away at Zelda 2 on my 3DS. You know. Because it was free. For me.
And THIS time, I beat it without the help of a guide.
This was one of those games that just tormented my siblings and me when it first came out. This was back in the day before we were able to beat ANY of our games. Yeah, we had Nintendo Power, but until Mega Man II came along, there were no THE END screens seen at our house.
Zelda 2 was my “brother’s” game–which meant he officially owned it, but I played it more and was better at it than him. I remember being able to get pretty far–but that path to the Great Palace just savaged my poor little Link. Grinding so I could max out my level stats? Perish the thought! You don’t do that when you’re 8. You’re just thrilled that you found New Kasuto and lived to tell about it!
So Zelda 2, like Zelda 1 and, yes, even the original Super Mario Bros, remained a piece of my childhood gaming that remained unbeaten. And once prettier and more forgiving games started to emerge, why would I want to trudge through something like Zelda 1′s maze of brown anyway? And I was pretty sure the ending didn’t have a giant animated Link walking ponderously toward the screen as the seasons change around him.
About 15 years later, something in me said it was time to return to these three ugly, difficult games. I’m not the greatest gamer in the world, but to consider myself a Nintendophile who never woke up Zelda or rescued Princess Toadstool? Somebody warm up the emulator!
Returning to the Hyrule of Zelda 2, player’s guide in tow, brought back a flood of memories, like exploring an old childhood haunt. I remembered where Bagu’s house was, how to kill red Ironknuckles without taking any damage, but, what’s more, I’d figured out by now that level grinding in games was a great way to make the absolute most of that weekly phone call to the parents (yeah, I’m a good son).
Then, there it was. The golden threshold. The insta-kill laser force-field of the Great Palace. I watched it go down, making a new sound effect (squee!) and sent my level 8 Link cautiously inside, pausing every several seconds to check the bent old strategy guide to make sure I was going the right way.
“How did they expect anyone to figure this out?!” was the thought that went through my head as the guide led me through false walls in elevator shafts and finally to what I have dubbed Zelda’s Simon’s Quest moment. How the crap was anybody supposed to know an invisible trap door one block wide was hiding under that row of breakable blocks?
The battle with Thunderbird was tense, but not impossible, and I remembered what everyone always said about beating Shadow Link. Duck in the left corner, stab, stab, stab. Get Triforce from some weird little man. Wake up Zelda. The end. Try to pronounce Japanese names.
It’s probably for the best that I never beat this game as a kid. There’s a very good chance I’d've tried to convince myself the ending was way better than it actually was. Sort of like how I did for this game. But for now, and as far as I’m concerned, Zelda’s awake and Hyrule is at peace. At least until they make a 3D remake.
What about you? Which old games have you dug up and attempted to beat?
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